Letter to my family, I feel betrayed

Just a quick thought I had recently. You all know me. You all know I was the best member of the church I could be. Yes I had problems and yes I made mistakes but I worked my butt off to be a little better each day. I was baptized. I was ordained to each level of the priesthood. I did my best to repent daily and be a better person. I never had premarital sex. I waited until I was 16 to go on dates. I kept myself worthy to go on a mission and served honorably for 2 years, I kept all the rules, I worked hard every day, I testified of Christ and the truthfulness of the church, despite not having my own spiritual witness. I came home and kept being the best Mormon I could, I went to college, I stayed active, I looked for a wife and got married in the temple. Then, despite wanting to enjoy just being a couple for a while, I followed the words of the prophets and had a kid. Then despite having problems getting pregnant again, we spent thousands of dollars to try and have more kids, I don't know all of my wife's motivations but mine were partly so our kid would have siblings and partly so we could do our job to bring spirit children of God into the world. Over the span of my life I've paid more than 100 thousand dollars to the church in tithing and in just the past 5 years my wife and I have paid over 80 thousand dollars to the church in tithing and offerings. The one thing I've been perfect at in my life is paying tithing. I have always been a full tithe payer. I may not have ever had a spiritual witness of anything but I believed with my whole soul the church was true and I was completely willing to give all I had to the church. Every time we were challenged to double our fast offerings we did, up until earlier this year we were donating $400 a month to help others because I believed the church was true and was good.   

I feel betrayed, sad and frustrated, that despite the life I've lived, despite knowing all of you intimately since we are family, none of you will give me the benefit of the doubt and find out why I feel the church is a lie. I know you don't want to consider the possibility the church is not true, believe me, I know how much that hurts, but don't you think maybe I did my due diligence? Maybe I really looked into the issues and considered it from a faithful perspective and not an apostate perspective? Maybe I'm right, the church isn't true and we have all been deceived? Are you so indoctrinated that you won't even hear all the reasons why the church isn't true?   

Our Brother and Sister-in-law are in a similar situation, do you really believe all three of us were deceived at about the same time and God did nothing to help any one of us see the truth? Maybe you think that he and I are sinners and that's why we couldn't feel the spirit warning us we were wrong, but what about his wife?   

I've read the Book of Mormon multiple times. I've prayed every time I read it and I never got the promised answer. I've read ex-mormon material and after the initial shock now I feel peace, it makes sense, it's logical, it's reasonable, it's based in fact, I've verified everything I read to make sure I wasn't misunderstanding and to make sure it wasn't being pulled out of context.