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Marriage for Salvation?

If Hellen Mar Kimball, the 14 year old girl who was given to Joseph by her father so that her family could have eternal life, was only sealed to Joseph for eternity then why was she and her mom so sad about the sealing? https://rsc.byu.edu/no-weapon-shall-prosper/subject-can-bear-investigation  (The article points out that there is no hard evidence that sex happened, however we know Brigham had teenage wives that had children, we know Lorenzo Snow had teenage wives who bore children, why wouldn't we think Joseph was also having sex with even his youngest wives? The articles confirms there is evidence he had sex with some of the wives. As you read you can see that this "eternity only" sealing caused lots of sadness for HMK and her mother who knew of others that were sealed to the prophet and were sad or mistreated because of it. So I feel it's reasonable given all of that to assume sex was happening and that the "eternity only" sealing had implications for the here and now otherwise HMK wouldn't have felt she couldn't experience romantic love in this life)

Also, how can Hellen Mar Kimball being sealed to Joseph Smith save her entire family? I thought everyone had to work out their own salvation. I can't recall a scripture or conference talk but I feel like we've been taught that each person has to work out their own salvation, you can't be extra good and then pull along your spouse or sibling to the celestial kingdom if they weren't keeping the commandments.

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